Waiting for Sunshine by my windows

He's sarcastic...he gossips as much as girls do..(maybe much more..hahaha)...he may seem rude sometimes, especially when he's mad...coz he's not the one who knows how to control his temper...he's my bestfriend... It's been 7years...7 years we've been bestfriend, 7 years he's been taking care of me...7 years of me listening to his nagging and what not...7 years of dissing each other... 7 years of saying how we loathe seeing each others face.. and 7 years, been in the same class by chance and not...hehhee...all I want to say is, I'm really thankful to have him in my life... Lots of people around us mistake the kind of relationship we had for love...sorry guys, it's not...hahhaa.. I see him as my brother..coz he's been taking care of me since daddy passed away...and while I'm far from home, he made sure that I ate, made sure that I'm not alone...and he's always there for me at that crucial moment..and he feels like family now... I know I never really done anything beneficial to him, accept listening to his crude remarks, his lovestruck moment and those kind of stuff, but that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate or care about him...huhuhuu... till now, he still take care of me...make sure that I eat, and giving me pocket money when I have none (waaaa~ malu~~ but thanks!!hehehe)... teaching me stuff...giving me notes...sharing stories...downloading dramas n songs...sharing new books...(though he's not much of a bookworm)...all sort of things you can share with your bestfriends...boys talk, girls talk...both!hahaha...
Lecturers used to "salah faham" when they saw us (since diploma)...coz sometimes, we think alike and we explain things and solve things similarly...and they thought we were more than friends...well, great minds do think alike though..hahaha... heck, not just lecturers, even my ex-bf used to be jealous of him...and some other guy in my past...hehehe...all I can say and keep saying is, He's a great guy, with high demand when it come to girls, and very sarcastic (you need to bear with it.. ;p)...and he's the best guy friend anyone could ask for...and he's my brother but with different parents...there~
this post is dedicated to you Mr Roman Carlos Panthera Pardus (you know who you are...giving out ur matrix nickname..hahahaha)

lots of love,

-Aziey Aj 2011-

aku merinduiNya
aku mendambakan ketenangan dariNya sekali lagi
aku merindukan diriku ketika aku didalam pelukanNya
aku merindukan diriku ketika aku sentiasa di dalam pandanganNya
diriNya memberikan hatiku satu perasaan bahagia
diriNya memberikan aku kepastian
diriNya menjanjikan aku cinta sejati
diriNya tiada bandingan
hatiku hanyalah untukNya
hatiku sentiasa merindukanNya
meskipun akal sentiasa membelakangiNya
hatiku sentiasa memanggil-manggil namaNya
Dialah satu-satunya dihatiku...kini dan selamanya
Hanya dirimu, Ya Allah~

I believe that even strangers can be families..especially when your real families are far away from you...
and I am blessed to meet this fabulous family with great parents and great children that accept me like I'm one of them and make me feel at home...
Uncle Naha, the uncle that I know through Dee...Dee's foster father...a wise man with lots of great ideas...a great father figure...makes me miss my own...
Auntie Suria, uncle's wife...a great mother..with very brilliant way of expressing herself in her blog..and I love reading it...hehee..and she really makes me feel at home..
Lala, their daughter...hmmm~ how should I describe her? based on what Dee's told me..we are not that much different..but I guess, she's in better place in that love department than I am..hehhee...she's great..known her not long ago..and I was touched when she see's me as one of her family...awww~ lala, I'm touched~ n_n
Abo, their youngest son...my favorite person in that house...he's brilliant...talkative, active, very bright kid...the same age as my little sister...makes me feel really at home, coz my little sis is just the same as Abo...when they see you, there will be endless questions coming out from their mouth..hahhaa..and sometimes, you'll be clueless in how to answer them...kids do say the darndest things...and they also makes us think...
I'm really thankful to have known them...and I hope one day, the family that I build with the person that loves me and accept me as I am, would be as good and strong as this family...

lots of love,
-Aziey Aj 2011-

its the next day already...how I wish last night would never end... *sob sob sob*
it's the greatest night I ever had with strangers around me...and I really feel grateful for having this awesome experience...
been performing and communicating with the deaf and mute kids..eventhough i can barely understand them, but I really missed them a lot! their little hands that keeps hugging me like they never want to let go , bring tears to my eyes...how I wish I could just take them all to my house and care for them and love them like my own child...they're special in their own way...they are so lovable, but why do human sometimes be ashamed of something as special as that? parents ignoring their special kids as if they were a burden to them? I still can't understand why...
and last night, all those hugs that I received, from the special kids...from Abo ( my cute little brother), from Auntie Sue (abo's mother)...those hugs gave me strength and love...and its a different love from what we feel when we like someone...this love is much more deeper...it's like the life of our soul...it feels like my soul was being fed with so much love from around me that I could burst any moment...hahaha...
aahhh~ how I wish, everyday could feel that way...I'll be stronger and content...
All you need in life is LOVE...nothing is stronger than that...and hugs is the way that love can reach the other party...I hugs almost all the special kids tonight..opss, last night...the littlest and cutest one, told me..(in sign language).."tonight, when we sleep, we will miss you"...and I was like ........I'm speechless...I feel like crying when after she said that, the other keep saying "we'll miss you" in sign language...and now, I'm missing them too...the hugs from all those small hands are addictive..especially when they doesn't want to let go...they didn't let go until they teacher keep saying goodbye to them and play around saying they want to leave them..hahaha...but still, they keep clinging to me and my friends...
and for all that experience, i'm really2 thankful and grateful for being where I am, and doing what I am doing now and being me...especially to our lecturer for giving us this life changing experience, bcoz not only we r able to learn their special language, we r able to receive their special love as well...spread the love, and love will come to you...
oooo~ how I missed them...wish I could see them again~ :'(

today...is tuesday... i know, i know...i should probably finish up my Virtual gallery project by today to be submit tomorrow..but, it seems like my brain is scattering thoughts and ramblings and i can't focus on my designing yet~  uh oh~
hahhaa...well, that's me..if I keep on trying hard to do this stuff, my brain will be dead and refused to listen to me anymore...so, well that explains why I'm here..hahaha..and I know if that 'ahjussi' are reading this now, he will be furious with me for not doing my works~hahaha...bianne ahjussi~ ;p

oh well...I'm trying to call up my muse now...
see ya guys later~

lots of loves!

-Aziey Aj-

I realized that my previous blog is mostly i poems like recently..hahaha..the agony...
and I know that that blog is mixed up...and mostly its about my never-been-a-happy-ending-relationships...hahhaa..how I wish i could make a song out of those posts.. ;p hehe
ahhh~ well, I'm trying to make this one a more cheerful and realistic..well, maybe a tad of dramatic effect and fairytales likes added here and there..it's hard to stop doing that...
So, maybe I'll focus on more brighter stuff and more motivational stuff here..while the other will be the antagonist character for this...
Hope it won't be a bore though..and to my readers (if there is anyone.. =.=), thank you for reading and your comments are much needed for me to improve~
See ya soon!~ (n_n)



-Aziey Aj-