بِسْمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحْمٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ
Imaan..it's not something that, once you got it, it will stay that way forever..
No sir..you're wrong..
It's an everyday struggle..for everyone
and it's a very slippery and tricky road going there
I tried, everyday..
to constantly able to be at peace with Allah in my heart
its a blissful and euphoric feelings..
something that makes you dont really care about the world in front of you
i tried, doing my best..
getting down on my knees with the same humbled feelings i have
begging for help and strength
but sometimes,
somedays, i failed to feel the blissful feeling
i failed to feel the same feeling that makes me feel okay
i failed myself and fall back to where i was before
and i tried getting out of it...
i tried...
but day time doesnt move fast enough
for only when I'm alone with Him
then I will be able to save my soul again
able to breathe again..
i tried...
but i'm still just a weak humble servant...
who still slip through the tiniest crack there is
who still fall when there's nothing to get a grip on
and all i can do is asking for Him to help me get through the day unscathed
so i can return to Him with remorse and ruefully
i am only human
and certain days, i feel like i was invisible
coz i got Him backing me up
and some days, i just feel helpless and hopeless
coz i guess i'm not sincere enough
i guess not really sincere enough yet... :'(
~naraj2014~
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